Ancient History's Wedding
What is it? About 2 in the morning? Yeah about that. Sorry, I just came back from a wedding, and I am a little discombobulated, not drunk, but I am glad I went with a friend, because I am in no shape to drive. Anyways with that said I hope you will excuse any digression, or misspellings or otherwise in this post, but it is about the wedding that I want to talk about.
It is the wedding of a friend of mine, Danny. Now Danny is the brother of a very close friend of mine, probably the best friend I have ever had, Joe. Sadly, a few years ago, Joe was killed in a traffic accident, which I will discuss in another post. Well, when he died, Danny and i have kept in touch, and it was natural for him to invite me to his wedding.
Now the wedding itself was fine, I guess. Well to be honest, it was a little ostentatious, a little too much show, but hell, that is what they wanted, and really it is their day. I mean it is almost like they were showing off, with the lavish hall, having not only a photographer (which is normal) but also a videographer (although there is nothing wrong with that either), the smoke machine, the Rolls Royce, the video presentation, etc, etc, etc..... It was all a show, but like I said, that is not what I was going to talk about, besides, it is not my business how they plan their wedding.
What I did want to talk about was the people there. In a way it was almost a trip into the past. Most of the people I knew 5, 6 years ago were there. Christine, Rich, Anthony, K, Hallie, Marissa, Rosie, Angelo, all of them were there. It was weird seeing them all again. It was a real pleasure seeing some of them, catching up on what has happened, however seeing some of them brought back some real bad memories, like the night Joe died, or the Vespers, or after the Stripes concert, or The Beach, or the night of Nina's party, and so forth. Those were times that I thought I had left behind, times that I had hoped would never be called to mind again. And although none of them actually mentioned those times, I could tell they remembered them, and I could see those events clearly in my mind's eye, as if they were happening all afresh.
These people were all there when I was trying to change my life for the better, some of them helped, some stood in my way, but all of them were part of it. And so seeing them all brought back conflicting memories. Of course I never said that to any of them. I was quite the gentleman, I spoke to them all, and even exchanged numbers with some of them. What bothers me is will this bring me back to the past I have tried so hard to escape from? Will this hinder any progress I have made? Or could this trip back to the past help me along? I mean a lot of them have changed from the people they were before, but still the memories remain. At a time like this, where I need friends more than ever, I don't want to push any away, but can I afford to have these ones back, with all the history that comes with them? They know me better than anyone, and to be fair they never left me, it was I who left them in pursuit of redemption. It's a tricky question, leaving the past, or using it? I really don't know what to do.
It is the wedding of a friend of mine, Danny. Now Danny is the brother of a very close friend of mine, probably the best friend I have ever had, Joe. Sadly, a few years ago, Joe was killed in a traffic accident, which I will discuss in another post. Well, when he died, Danny and i have kept in touch, and it was natural for him to invite me to his wedding.
Now the wedding itself was fine, I guess. Well to be honest, it was a little ostentatious, a little too much show, but hell, that is what they wanted, and really it is their day. I mean it is almost like they were showing off, with the lavish hall, having not only a photographer (which is normal) but also a videographer (although there is nothing wrong with that either), the smoke machine, the Rolls Royce, the video presentation, etc, etc, etc..... It was all a show, but like I said, that is not what I was going to talk about, besides, it is not my business how they plan their wedding.
What I did want to talk about was the people there. In a way it was almost a trip into the past. Most of the people I knew 5, 6 years ago were there. Christine, Rich, Anthony, K, Hallie, Marissa, Rosie, Angelo, all of them were there. It was weird seeing them all again. It was a real pleasure seeing some of them, catching up on what has happened, however seeing some of them brought back some real bad memories, like the night Joe died, or the Vespers, or after the Stripes concert, or The Beach, or the night of Nina's party, and so forth. Those were times that I thought I had left behind, times that I had hoped would never be called to mind again. And although none of them actually mentioned those times, I could tell they remembered them, and I could see those events clearly in my mind's eye, as if they were happening all afresh.
These people were all there when I was trying to change my life for the better, some of them helped, some stood in my way, but all of them were part of it. And so seeing them all brought back conflicting memories. Of course I never said that to any of them. I was quite the gentleman, I spoke to them all, and even exchanged numbers with some of them. What bothers me is will this bring me back to the past I have tried so hard to escape from? Will this hinder any progress I have made? Or could this trip back to the past help me along? I mean a lot of them have changed from the people they were before, but still the memories remain. At a time like this, where I need friends more than ever, I don't want to push any away, but can I afford to have these ones back, with all the history that comes with them? They know me better than anyone, and to be fair they never left me, it was I who left them in pursuit of redemption. It's a tricky question, leaving the past, or using it? I really don't know what to do.
posted by The Cube at 9:54 PM
1 Comments:
Hey Cube, after you commented on my blog, I read this, and it made me think of you. It is from Storypeople--they are great. www.storypeople.com
Real Hero
Anyone can slay a dragon, he told me, but try waking up every morning & loving the world all over again. That's what takes a real hero.
Generally speaking, I think acknowledging the past helps one move towards a better future. But, I don't think that means putting yourself back in potentially compromsing situations.
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